Blog

Today, we have an awesome giveaway associated with our new, just-birthed BabyMap portal: a $100 package to Bootyland,  a Green America-certified business that has become Seattle's resource for modern eco-conscious clothing and toys for women, kids, toddlers and babies.

The Bootyland gift package includes:

- a $25 Bootyland store gift certificate
- a ladybug rattle
- a Thirsties duo snap cloth diaper wrap
- monster feet cashmere booties
- a Thirsties hemp diaper
- So Anna Chenille Bib

How to enter the giveaway:

It's easy! Just leave a comment on this post about your favorite current baby or toddler product. Include your email in the comment form so that we can contact you if you are the winner.

Additional entries will be given for the following (leave an extra comment for each action to let us know):

1. Follow ParentMap on Pinterest

2. Like ParentMap on Facebook

3. Follow ParentMap on Twitter

4. Follow Bootyland on Facebook.

5. Share this post on Facebook

6. Tweet this post on Twitter

This giveaway ends Friday, May 10, at noon. We will leave a comment reply for the winner by the end of the day.

Make sure to check back to see if you've won if you haven't already heard from us by email!

Thanks to all who entered this bundle of joy! This giveaway is now closed and a lucky winner has been chosen.

And be sure to hop over to our new BabyMap site for the latest baby/pregnancy news and resources, including baby sleep tips, hottest apps for new parents, monthly milestones that matter, and much more.

I was stumped today. My daughter asked me the spelling of the vibrant hues, the characters in the rainbow. She asked me to spell the essence of nature.

Ok, she wasn’t asking in those particular words, and it wasn’t all that deep. If I have to get to the point (getting there), she was asking me to spell ‘color’ for her.

Yes, I am educated. Yes, I have a post graduate degree. Yes, I’ve been able to navigate life in the U.S. with my English. Therefore, I must know the basics of the language and the spelling of the word ‘color.’

But you see, to me  — it’s ‘colour.’ I know DD is going to drop the ‘u’ when she learns about it in her American school. So I wasn’t sure if I should confuse her. As certain as I am that my daughter is going to be the next Einstein, CV Raman, Shakespeare, Roger Federer and Margaret Thatcher combined, I didn’t think she would be able to understand my explanation of the differences between American and British English at age 4. And I didn’t feel completely prepared to tackle the topic, especially since her current favorite (See, autocorrect won’t let me type ‘favourite’ without that glaring red underline) English word is ‘why.’

You see, I fell into an abyss last week, trying to explain why ‘no’ and ‘go’ were similarly spelled but her favorite accessory, ‘bow’ was not ‘b–o’. Before you judge me, I wasn’t trying to force spelling down her throat. She spells things phonetically and writes words the way she says them. The problem arises when she reads the word; that’s when she feels I’ve been tricking her. Aah ... the eternal problems with correlation. You’re nodding your head empathetically now aren’t you?

I would much rather teach her Hindi, our native tongue. It’s so simple. Each sound has a letter. Each letter makes a different sound, so there’s no cause for confusion, and I can sleep in peace knowing my daughter would never think I was trying to trick her.

But no, the little one is an ‘Englishian’ (the term she coined for herself because she loves talking in English.) and will communicate only in English. And spelling — well, that’s just part of the problem.

The English that we’re used to is very different from the English we hear here. And she’s often baffled that people just don’t get her. Granted she’s developing a confusing accent now  —a combination of Indian and American — but the problem is not that. The problem is with the difference in the words used. And it’s not just her problem, it’s mine. too. People don’t understand what we’re talking about until we play charades with them and act out what we’re trying to convey.

Mother’s Day has become fairly predictable in my family. I pretend to be asleep as the sounds of clanking dishes and giggling children echo down the hallway. Just when I feel like my bladder won’t let me feign sleep any longer, my three kids burst through the door with a tray of toast and orange juice. Usually there’s a small vase full of dandelions and a hand-made card declaring me the “World’s Best Mom!”

My youngest, a toddler, crawls onto my lap and gestures for me to feed him. I share the slightly burnt toast dripping in jam with him and tell them that it’s the most delicious breakfast I have ever eaten. The kids beam with pride. Later that morning, I am greeted by sticky gobs of jam smeared on the fridge and a sink full of dishes.

I love this Mother’s Day ritual. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say that a small part of me wishes for something else, something a little more selfish. Perhaps a day where “alone time” didn’t entail hiding in a locked bathroom, or a day where the only thing on my agenda was to lay in bed and read books. Maybe even a massage at one of those fancy spas.

We asked readers on our Facebook page and Parentmap staffers their secret Mother’s Day wish. The range of answers is a mix of sentimental, humorous and humbling.

What is your secret Mother’s Day wish?

Highlights from facebook.com/parentmap

"My to do list completely done so I can spend the whole day having fun with my kids
without thinking of the 1,000 things I still need to do." — Megan F.

"Two nights of uninterrupted sleep." — Corinne S.

"Latte, swim, art making, yummy lunch, laughter, wine, art making, wine, yummy dinner, game night." — Celeste D.

"Some good one-on-one time with my busy 29-year-old daughter, perhaps dinner and a play." — Chalice B.

"A child support check would be nice." — Mary R.

"A day where all the poop and pee make it into the potty." — Anne S.

Time travel: I’d give anything to go back in time and hold and play with my daughters when they were babies/toddlers. — Myriam G.

"Hotel room. Room service. A few movies. Alone." — Amy C.

"To be able to put my kids in stasis for a year. I don't want to miss out on their lives, but I NEED A BREAK!!" — Laurie R.

"Sometimes I see how quickly my kids are growing and changing that it makes my head spin. I'd love, for one day, to have them both be babies again. (Well, maybe not on the same day...)" — Patty L.

"I'm divorced, so every other Sunday, I actually do get to live that fantasy of alone time and uninterrupted sleep and even spa days… It is sweet, but it also has a touch of the bitter. So I guess I'll have to cheese out and have my wish be that my children will be able to find balance, security and comfort in a world where they have two homes." — Elisa T.

"Getting a gift or special activity planned completely by the kids and their dad with out any encouragement from me." — Tiffany L.

"To be able to use the bathroom without someone saying 'What, what, what you doing?'" — Jessi L.

Please take a moment to share your secret Mother’s Day wish in the comments below. Feel free to forward it to your child or spouse with your comment highlighted, circled and underlined.

“We mothers are learning to mark our mothering success by our daughters’ lengthening flight.” –Letty Cottin Pogrebin This Mother’s Day solidly marks a change that has been slowly coming to my mothering world.

My oldest daughter, KK, will be in San Francisco with her Girl Scout Troop that weekend and she will return to the nest late Mother’s Day. I’m one of those moms that are always sneaking off for some solitude on this national holiday. But I have a feeling I will hold on pretty tightly to my younger daughter when she comes to my bedroom for her morning snuggle, and I’ll shed a few tears as I greet my older girl at the airport. With KK, I’m firmly in the learning-how-to-let-go phase of parenting.

Yes, yes, parenting is always about this, but there is a clear delineation happening at our house right now. I had an easy time with letting my girls walk atop the backyard’s cement wall, and I secretly adore watching them sit on the roof of their tree house.

But the moment at school when KK’s friend was clearly telling her that her mom was walking by, and my girl was clearly ignoring me? That stung.

When I told KK I was quitting as co-leader of her Girl Scout Troop as it became clear she would be a more grown-up version of herself without me there, she let a small, happy “OK!” burst from her being and then she smiled. She cares too much what I think; after the smile she asked why I was quitting and wanted to make sure I was OK with it.

The irony is that I stayed leading her troop for so long because I didn’t know who would replace me, and I knew KK loved Girl Scouts. Um, no, the troop is stronger than ever. And the Girl Scout leader called me this fall to tell me how KK is stepping up, becoming more helpful and independent and willing to try difficult tasks without me to cry to when things are not going right.

I recall years ago that another Girl Scout leader told me she doesn’t lead her daughter’s troop, choosing to lead another troop. I thought, "How mean! That is unbelievable!" Now I agree with her, though I know that it was impossible to see the journey before me all those years ago.

Spring is when we liven up our gardens and yards. How about rejuvenating our love lives? Sociologist and sexologist Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D. will address this topic in her talk, “Let’s Get Intimate! How to Balance Life, Love and Your Growing Family” at two BabyMap events which will be held at Seattle Children’s Theatre, 5:30 p.m. May 15; and at Bellevue College, 10 a.m. May 18.

Schwartz recently shared some secrets about what makes some couples happier than others. To hear more, watch Schwartz on KING 5 (on KONG, channel 6) 8:15 a.m. May 6.

In the book you wrote with Chrisanna Northrup and James Witte, The Normal Bar, you talk about balance in family life, but more importantly balance in a relationship. What do you mean by that?

Couples need to focus not just on giving children everything they think they need, but also on what their partner needs. Remember, that mother or father of your child is also your friend and your lover. You have to figure out a way to keep that relationship relevant.

When you as a relationship and sex expert “peek behind the relationship curtain” as you put it, what do you see?

From new research, we see the importance of affection. These can be even small acts — holding hands, spontaneous kisses, backrubs, for instance. It’s surprising how few parents take get-away vacations. We found only one-fourth do that, and it is so important to a relationship. In fact, 80 percent of the couples who describe themselves as “extremely happy” go on date nights, date lunches or the like.

We are giving away 3 copies of Chasing Tails, a new picture book by acclaimed artist and Monkey World creator Matthew Porter, depicting a parade of colorful animals that trot, run, and scamper across the pages.

How to enter the giveaway:

It's easy! Just leave a comment on this post about one of your favorite kids' books. Include your email in the comment form so that we can contact you.

Additional entries will be given for the following (leave an extra comment for each action to let us know):

1. Follow ParentMap on Pinterest

2. Like ParentMap on Facebook

3. Follow ParentMap on Twitter

4. Follow Matthew Porter on Facebook.

5. Share this post on Facebook

6. Tweet this post on Twitter

This giveaway ends Monday, May 6, at 5 p.m. We will leave a comment reply for the winner by the end of the day.

Make sure to check back to see if you've won if you haven't already heard from us by email!

Three winners chased away the competition and have won! Thanks to all who entered!