Skip to main content

Your Top Back-to-School Questions, Answered by These Experts

Three parenting pros answer questions for kindergarten through college

Published on: July 27, 2018

Your Top Back-to-School Questions, Answered by These Experts

Young boy doing homework

Elementary: Does my kid really need to do homework?

Meghan Leahy: The studies are clear that younger kids don’t need to do homework. More and more schools are coming around to this and are only assigning reading time with caregivers, [but] if your school assigns homework for kids in kindergarten through second grade, you can advocate for your kids to not do homework. 

Think about doing this if homework is causing a rift in the relationship between you and your child, if it makes your kid hate school or [a certain subject] or if it makes them feel stupid.

Of course, there are cases where young kids need additional support outside of school, such as if they have learning differences or executive functioning issues … or don’t have books and resources in their homes. I would never say that all kids should not do homework. 

Still, parents shouldn’t be afraid to advocate to their teachers about having their kids skip the nightly homework during those early years [of kindergarten through second grade]. At the beginning of the [school] year, say really casually, “Hey, we’re going to see how homework goes. I really believe homework is my child’s work, so if it’s not going well for them, I’m not going to push them to do it. I’ll stay in contact with you. If you feel like my child is falling behind in reading or math, please let me know.”

The goal is to let the teacher know that you care about learning, that you appreciate their support in guiding your child and that you’ll stay in touch about your family’s decision to possibly opt out of homework. 

But by third, fourth and fifth grade, kids are more mature and able to handle homework. This work helps prepare them for middle school, and it often involves projects that stretch their mind and creativity. The homework ritual is always a dance, but you can trust yourself when you are sitting with a 5-year-old who is crying over a math worksheet. You can say, “No, you don’t need to do this worksheet tonight.”

If homework is a nightmare, it’s crucial that the folks at school know about it.

Ross Greene: I tend to be in the camp that believes there is way too much homework. Still, the answer is very individualized. 

Sure, [your child should do homework] if it’s not onerous and they are having no difficulty doing it. But if your kid is struggling to do homework, we have to ask: What is getting in the kid’s way?  

Homework shouldn’t be the primary way a kid learns new things [but rather a] means of practicing what has been taught at school. [If homework is hard,] is the material not being taught well? If a kid is having difficulty completing homework that is a replication of what they are learning in school, that’s a warning sign that things are difficult at school, too.

If homework is a nightmare, it’s crucial that the folks at school know about it. … It’s also crucial to take a much closer look at the factors that are making homework so difficult.

Establish whether similar difficulties are being seen at school. Homework struggles are often symptomatic of general difficulties in attention, processing and learning, and a formal evaluation might be necessary. We also need to take a look at factors that may be competing with homework: Some kids are so tapped out from extracurriculars that they just don’t have any energy left for homework. 

I find that there’s a tendency to attribute difficulties with homework completion to motivation; I also find that this tendency distracts us from taking a closer look at what’s really getting in the way for a child. 

Share this resource with your friends!