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Picture this: It’s parent-teacher night
You’re frantically searching for the Zoom link or rushing through crowded hallways, bumping into other parents as you try to find your child’s math classroom. You finally see the teacher’s smiling face. She greets you warmly, but you’re not fooled — you remember your own math trauma all too well.
Math anxiety is real. As a math teacher with 35 years of experience, I’ve seen terrified parents walk into my classroom more times than I can count. When I started teaching, parent-teacher night was all about going over the topics I covered in the course, sharing my office hours, and peppering in my love for math with a few fun riddles.
However, I’ve come to understand that what parents truly care about is finding ways to support their children’s success in math. So, after over three decades in the classroom, I’ve curated five practical tips that I now share with nervous parents. These strategies empower parents to help their kids thrive in math without having to solve any math problems. I’ve noticed that parents now feel more equipped to help their kids succeed, and as a result, my students are taking greater ownership of their learning.
1. Avoid sharing your personal math history with your child
Whether good or bad, research shows that telling your child you struggled with math might unintentionally give them an excuse to do the same and may spread math anxiety “like a virus.” On the other hand, telling them you excelled could make them feel inadequate if they find math challenging.
Instead, focus on encouraging a growth mindset and emphasizing effort and perseverance over past experiences. I recommend watching former math teacher and current UPenn professor Angela Duckworth’s TED talk on the impact of grit with your child. Her research reveals that those who are the most successful are not necessarily the most talented, but those with the most passion and perseverance for the subject.
Here are three questions that you can ask your child after watching the talk to help process Duckworth’s ideas:
- What does Duckworth mean when she says, “Talent counts in my book — but effort counts twice”?
- Can you think of a time when you used grit when something was difficult or frustrating and it worked?
- What does grit look like when completing a math homework assignment or studying for a test?
Also, check out Stanford University professor of math education Jo Boaler’s website for more information on encouraging a growth mindset, specifically in math.
For many math students, the struggle is real! But Boaler claims that this struggle is good, suggesting that our brains are like muscles that need to be challenged just like working out at the gym. So if your child is struggling in math and making mistakes, not only is it okay, it’s a positive step! Mistakes are a natural part of learning, but the key is that students learn from them by checking their answers to their homework in the back of the book, working backward to correct errors, and getting further explanations from their teacher. In Duckworth’s words, it pays off to be gritty about completing homework and to resist the impulse just to give up or write down incorrect answers, or worse, copy correct answers without understanding where they came from.
2. Practice math like a sport
Many of my students assume that math is not a skill that can be gained by studying and see it instead as a gift that they either have or do not have. This is not true!
I believe that math is like sports. If a child is to do well in a particular sport, they have to practice that soccer kick or that softball pitch over and over again until it becomes muscle memory. The same is true for math. In order to be successful, students need to practice, practice, practice.
However, this does not mean doing the same review sheet five times. That will only help students memorize those problems. And while memorization of formulas is good for math class, memorization of how to solve ten specific problems is not.
I find that students who repeatedly complete the review sheet leading up to the test often tell me that they “blanked out” while doing the assessment. I believe this is because they did not see the exact problem that they memorized from the worksheet. What I recommend, in addition to completing the review sheet, is for students to redo their notes or worksheets, particularly blank ones from class.
In my experience, teachers draw test questions directly from their lessons, so redoing blank notes without looking back and then comparing them with the originals can shed light on gaps in understanding, helping to reinforce learning.
There is one caveat: students should not passively just “look over” their notes. I tell them this is like watching your coach pitch the ball over and over again and waiting until game day to throw the pitch out yourself. If their teacher doesn’t provide blank notes or worksheets, you can photocopy or scan the ones they did in class and redact the answers. This is a productive and easy way for a parent to help their child succeed even when they can’t do the math themselves.
3. Activate ‘spaced practice’
Encourage your child to ask their teacher for additional review sheets or helpful videos. In my classroom, I provide links to both on our school portal for every topic I teach, allowing students to personalize their learning by selecting topics to explore throughout the week before a test.
This is called spaced practice, as opposed to massed practice, also known as cramming. For example, a day or two after learning the second section in a chapter, loop back and complete a new worksheet on the first section to help identify any gaps they may not even know they had.
According to research, spaced practice leads to better long-term retention and avoids the false confidence associated with massed practice. Students should spread out this studying over the week prior to the test. For example, on the weekend when your child has more time, they can complete and check a review sheet for a topic that was taught earlier in the week. If their teacher does not provide worksheets, Google the lesson topic with “worksheet + answers” for additional opportunities for skill-building. The Algebros posts excellent worksheets and videos for topics ranging from Math 7 to AP Calculus, for example.
4. Lean into the power of peer tutoring
Whether tutoring or being tutored, research shows that both the tutor and the student being tutored benefit from problem-solving together. Sociocultural theorist Lev Vygotsky emphasized that math learning thrives in social interactions, where students explain and defend ideas to each other.
Sometimes peers can explain concepts in a way that clicks better than a teacher’s explanation. In class, I frequently ask, “Who can explain this differently?” Student perspectives often resonate more effectively, and seeing multiple strategies can help students understand the power of approaching problems from different angles to find solutions.
5. Encourage your child to ‘eat the frog’
“Eating the frog” is a concept coined by motivational speaker Brian Tracy. This means tackling the most difficult, frustrating task first instead of putting it off as most of us are naturally inclined to do.
Many students prioritize easy homework for quick gratification but run out of steam for harder assignments. By completing the toughest work first, students can focus their best efforts and feel a greater sense of accomplishment. Helping them plan out a study schedule for the week can be a way to work together on math without the tears and fears.
Less fear, more grit
These days at parent-teacher night, as I share these five tips, I see parents fervently taking notes and nodding in agreement, sometimes even sending me thoughtful emails thanking me for sharing Duckworth’s talk on grit afterward. In class, my students are now regularly talking about “spaced learning” and are (mostly) avoiding cramming.
Being a teenager — or the parent of one — can be stressful enough, so let’s work together to ease math anxiety. I know that with the right strategies, all students (and parents!) can succeed because I see it happen every year in my classroom.
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